Learn To Be More Present During Your Wedding Day
Top Tips for being more present on your wedding day from a wedding photographer
Why is a wedding photographer giving me advice on being more present on my wedding day? Wedding days are very different from everyday life, in theory they are everything like the dream you imagine. But all to easily they can turn into stressful nightmares where your sole job is worrying about everything and everyone, and as a wedding photographer id say I’m qualified to say I’ve seen both sides of the coin, and I know which looks more enjoyable. We have talked to countless brides and grooms that seem to have it all under control and most have a similar outlook, along with compiling top tips from our brides and grooms we have also talked to industry specialists’ wellbeing and being more present.
Your wedding day is going to be up there with the most stimulating dopamine hitting day of your life. Almost all of us struggle in day-to-day life to stay present in the moment, to really engage with what’s going on, the powerhouse stimulants that are our phones are so very good at keeping us living in constant distraction rather than being present and enjoying simple pleasures. Now fast forward to potentially the most important day of your life, certainly one of the most memorable days, there will be an infinite number of things you could worry about on your wedding day, but in truth once the ball is in motion there’s little you can do to stop it, so talk about some great tips on how to stay in the moment and enjoy the ride.
Practice meditation
The truth is, the simplest solution to staying in the moment during your wedding is to practice it before your big day, it’s no good just having all the theory in place, the reality is that staying present is actually quite hard work, our mind naturally wanders in modern life, we have to train it to realise that sometimes the things we worry about, the list of jobs to do, they are all either in the future or in the past and will be no different whether we deal with them straight away or tomorrow.
I know, there will be some eyes rolling at this comment, but trust me, Meditation is like a cheat sheet to life. Once you start, you’ll wonder why on earth you haven’t been doing it your whole life, why it wasn’t taught at school, and why everyone isn’t doing it to. You’ll want to shout about it as loud as you did your engagement.
How do you get into meditation, it doesn’t have to be daunting, there’s so many really good guided apps, have a go on a few free versions to find one you like, We have been using headspace for years, we try really hard to not use guided meditations (it’s supposed to be a bit more authentic an experience when you are fully internally focused, BUT, it is such an easy way to break into the space and learn a routine)
Relearn to monotask
As a dad, business owner and someone that is trying to juggle many things at once, trying to focus specifically on one task feels like an alien thing and like I’m wasting my time, but when it’s an important task that really means something and I want to savour the experience, it’s so important to not have lots of other things going on. Multitasking is really the opposite of being present in the moment. Hopefully your day will run smoothly, but if there are hiccups embrace them for what they are, adding character and uniqueness to your wedding day. To monotask you may need to make some important changes to your routine and a big one is going to be that aeroplane shaped icon on your phone.
Learn to leave your phone on airplane mode
Ideally turned off altogether. This is super easy right, just turn your phone off, no problem. The reality for most of us (including myself) is that we’ve been so powerfully conditioned to need that constant companion that they are difficult to turn off, to remove ourselves from the dopamine hit we get from the notifications and alerts, but trust us, there will dopamine to spare for all right there in the moment on your wedding day.
We know you are going to want to have some selfies with your friends on the wedding day, but don’t forget, you will almost certainly be paying a wedding photographer to document the day for you, make the most of that, and if you want that more authentic true to life “selfie shot” let one of your friends take it for you.
Allow wiggle room in your schedule
As wedding photographers, we always advice our couples to use their order of service as a guide, or wish list, things always change on the day and it’s important that there’s a little slack in the system to compensate for this, if you don’t those little unforeseen issues are going to feel like catastrophic problems.
Delegate
It’s time to build yourself a trustworthy crack team of friends and family, even pull your photographer in on the game.
There will almost certainly be somethings that happen that aren’t on the order of service for your wedding, whether they are big or small problems, if you build yourself a trustworthy team that are happy to have the responsibility of problem solving the issues it will take all the pleasure of you on the day and allow you to just sit back and enjoy the moments, maybe even be able to sit back and laugh about the problems when it’s not you having to solve them. Make sure the venue manager and key crew know who these people are that will be taking charge should anything come up. All too often we see couples looking harassed by venue managers over issues that could easily be decided by someone else, but unless you make it clear uncle bob will be re icing the cake when the kids have taken a big bite out the side that worry will fall to you on the day.